And you caused it.

"And if you're still bleeding, you're the lucky ones.

'Cause most of our feelings, they are dead and they are gone.



And if you're in love, then you are the lucky one,

'Cause most of us are bitter over someone.

Setting fire to our insides for fun,

To distract our hearts from ever missing them.

But I'm forever missing her."



 

Call me a safe bet I'm betting I'm not.

Unfaithfully yours.

Back to oblivion.

“When you are lonely, sit with it. Feel it move through your veins. Feel it mix with your breath. There is only one way out of this and that is through. Feel how strong you are to be able to live with such quiet around you and such roars within you. Listen to your heart, how it beats like the thin hand of a clock. Ask it what it wants. Make lists of all the things you dream will fill this space one day. A clapboard house with coffee simmering on the stove. Homemade bread and a hand to hold.

When you are lonely, remind yourself how awful it feels to fill this time with anything other than what you truly yearn for. You could go to his bed- nothing would stop you, you could go right now- but you wouldn’t feel any less alone while lying next to someone when that someone doesn’t love you like you deserve. He doesn’t know about the knot in the bottom of your stomach and he’ll fall asleep before it loosens.

When you are lonely, cultivate it. Cradle it. These moments feel like background noise but they are anything but. You are learning your way around yourself. You are drawing a map you will consult for the rest of your life. Ask yourself the hard things. How do you like your eggs cooked? Do you want to have children? How do you feel about global warming?

When no one else is around, you can hear your own voice. Even if it is a gentle, quiet thing there are so many things you can learn from it. Take your time.

When you are lonely, light a candle that smells like home or maybe one that smells like pine trees you’ve never seen before. Kiss your forehead in the mirror and have a glass of wine. Write a poem. Or don’t.

When you are lonely, the universe is giving you space to be with yourself. Don’t waste it.”

The greatest story ever told.

Hubo un tiempo y un lugar todo lleno de errores, y una cara que estaba llena de mierda. Estaba frustrado y enojado. Yo estaba más que vivo. Un guardián entre el centeno.

Por fin sincera escribiste para ti misma que fuiste una mentirosa y que jugaste con los sentimientos de otras personas, me da pena leer esas cosas que no suenan a ti, pero de todas formas quien conoce hoy en día a las personas, si solo fingen delante de todo el mundo ser las personas que les gustaría ser. Me ha dado mucha pena leerte, me he sentido muy decepcionado y la verdad es que debería darme igual como te da igual cualquier cosa que pueda escribir yo, pero en fin.

Todas las personas mienten, todas las personas les gustaría ser otras personas, todos son unos "quiero ser" y no puedo. Feo es feo, la transformación es un sueño, así que ama lo que eres, no lo que te gustaría ser.

Soy un animal, soy un borracho, soy un hombre con una guitarra, estoy tratando de encontrar lugares para respirar ahora y si esto fuera un libro yo lo llamaría canción el capítulo final, y si lo pudieses leer acabarais riendo.

Tomate un relajante amante, o explotaras. Algún día dirás "Te amo" y sabrás que es mentira. Tu me dijiste que me amabas y hoy yo se que era mentira.

You+Me

Can't promise that things won't be broken, but I swear that I will never leave.

“So many people live within unhappy circumstances and yet will not take the initiative to change their situation because they are conditioned to a life of security, conformity, and conservatism, all of which may appear to give one peace of mind, but in reality nothing is more damaging to the adventurous spirit within a man than a secure future. The very basic core of a man’s living spirit is his passion for adventure. The joy of life comes from our encounters with new experiences and hence there is no greater joy than to have an endlessly changing horizon, for each day to have a new and different sun.”

I love the way you call it art when you never even use your heart.

Final backwards

Right here right now it's never felt more real than this.  So if it's the last scene, make it a bloody scene because when I die I want it to be because someone hates me with every fiber of their being.

I've tried to hold what I can, you should see these scars that are on my hands. Letting go is never easy to do, everyday's a new door that we all must go through. I've learned so much, you're never gone, my friend. I know we'll meet the same shining end.

Forget the who, the what, the when, the where, the why. Did you love something with all of your might?

The colors brighter
The music louder
The stakes higher
The kisses longer
Things that need leaving
Rules there for the breaking
Battles that should be raging
Leave your mark on everyone
Age is death, love is worth it
And hard work, it pays off 

And time is running out

But sometimes things aren't so easy, sometimes you have got to chose between what is simple and what you know is right to prove that, "you can count on me." Was what you meant when you spoke up to write the chapter on who you are in your heart when we were so in love with pretty words like loyalty, and unity, this is you legacy. Where will you be? Where you there or did you run?

I won't carry you in my heart, you are my heart, my everywhere and everything. The walls I'll climb and the wars I'll fight, loved you in the deepest way became the man who I am today. You made me feel just like a hammer in a world lined with nails.

I will fill what is left of my days with the the things that I love the most.

This is my final backward glance, I've never been much good at saying goodbye.

Oh, foolish me. Goodbye.

Try to hear me through the static, through the static.

Sapiosexual.

Encantado.
Soy sapiosexual y lo que me pone de ti es tu inteligencia.

Me pone saber que tu mente es inquieta. Que te pongan las letras, la música, la ciencia, el arte. Que a nada estimulante le digas que no. Me pone tanto que me estimules. Que todo te cause curiosidad y que desarmes y rearmes todo; mis pensamientos, los tuyos. Me pone que cuestiones al mundo, que no des nada por sentado, que vulneres el orden, sediciosa, subversiva. Me pone que empujes tus límites y que empujes los míos, que me dejes sin aliento, que me dejes deseando más.

Me pone cuando sabes cosas que yo no sé, y me las explicas, y me haces cómplice. Me pone que tus ideas me penetren, que tus palabras me violenten. Que me transgredas y me atravieses entero, charlando. Me pone que sepas leerme. Que entiendas mi idioma. Que me pilles el humor, que me pilles la mirada. Que me retes y me invites a vivir en tu cabeza, y que me no me agotes mientras te busco, fulminante. Me excita que sepas cómo encontrar mi epicentro.

Me pone que te pienses ignorante. Que creas que sabes poco y que te falta aún por saber. Me pone que te conozcas tan bien que sepas entenderte, entenderme, y que siempre busques saber más. Que te comprometas con tus ideas y que no te de miedo cuestionarte o discutir: con los demás, contigo misma. Me pone que te explores y que me explores a mí. Que sepas usar tu tiempo y que sepas cómo no perderlo. Me pone sentir que contigo me encuentro. Que contigo soy.

Me pone que no escuches a tus demonios, esos que te dicen que no eres lo suficientemente buena. Me pone que te vuelvas temperamental, trabajólica, difícil, brillante. Porque sabes lo que quieres. Porque vas hacia lo que quieres. Porque vienes, si lo que quieres soy yo.

Fóllame el cerebro. El cuerpo luego seguirá.

Until the fucking wheels come off, baby.

Todos tomamos nuestras propias decisiones, que es el motivo por el cual nadie debería quejarse por nada.

Siempre ha formado parte de mí, desde que era un niño. El primer recuerdo que tengo relacionado con la música es ver a unos abuelos tocando el acordeón y la pandereta para mi hermano y para mí. Cantando viejas canciones folk y country. Fue la primera vez en mi vida que percibí la música como algo bueno para mí. Fue la primera vez que recuerdo sentir la música. Nunca lo olvidaré. Creo que todo aquello que nos toca de algún modo en nuestra vida, permanece en nosotros hasta que decidimos expresarlo de alguna otra forma.

Quiero perder la memoria, quiero borrar este lugar.

I have tried to carry you as far as I could go but I'm not strong enough to do this on my own. I pack my bags and leave this town because I'm not welcome back here any more upon these shores.

New Old.

He estado pensando en nosotros. Nuestra historia, ¿Cómo cojones la resumo?¿Ha sido perfecta? Para nada. Cualquier historia centrada en mí siempre será poco menos que un completo y rutilante desastre. Pero hay algo que sé seguro. Nuestro tiempo bajo el sol ha sido algo de una absoluta puta belleza. Las pesadillas, las madrugadas, follar y dar puñetazos, la reluciente y espléndida demencia de esta ciudad nuestra en la que durante años me he despertado, la he cagado, he dicho lo que sentía, me he desmayado y lo he vuelto a repetir todo de nuevo. Como escritor y lector, me suelen chiflar los finales felices. El chico consigue a la chica. Ella le salva de él mismo... fundido en puto negro. Como un tío que ama a una mujer, me doy cuenta de que no existe tal cosa. No hay puesta de sol. Solo existe el ahora y solo estamos nosotros dos, lo que puede ser aterrador de cojones a veces. Pero si cierras los ojos y escuchas el susurro de tu corazón, si simplemente lo sigues intentando y no te rindes jamas, no importa cuántas veces lo malinterpretes, hasta que el principio y el final se difuminen convirtiéndose en un "hasta que volvamos a encontrarnos".

Y eso es todo. No sé cómo acabarlo... porque no ha acabado. Nunca acabará, mientras existas tú, exista yo y haya esperanza...

Hasta que las putas ruedas dejen de tocar el suelo.

Play it loud.

I hope you find what you’ve been looking for before I find my way to the door. I hope your pride capsizes from the tears in your eyes and drown in them like so many before. I hope you change yourself for the better and reach the potential we all know we saw. I hope I dig my own grave with the things that I say. Let my actions get my point across. We’re missing something significant in the dialogue, it’s not my problem. I choose to be reclusive amongst the sound. It comes around when I need it most, it’s mostly closer to me than anything, closer than you could ever be. The antidote for everything. I’d give anything to have everything turn out Okay. I’d give half of every day to have the other half turn out half decently apart from all the mistakes we make to break away. I’d give anything, whatever it takes. In the wake of the way things will never be again, it’s too dark to read your face through hard times, so here’s my advice, HERE'S MY ADVICE! Play the fastest record you can find, louder than your stereo will allow. Hotwire your speakers, do whatever you have to. Smash the mirrors in your house. Go home and lock your bedroom door, don’t open it for anything at all. Live every word, scream every song, these four chords could save your...

Go home and lock your bedroom door, don’t open it for anything at all. Live every word, scream every song, these four chords could save your life.

No shame.

Little Bones.

Interesting perspective.

I have the unfortunate luck of finding too many girls in my life and not enough women. It’s not an age thing – some women are younger than girls. The difference is in the way the two types act, think and live their lives.

Women and girls see the world differently. They understand the world differently. And they interact with it differently. Girls are a dime a dozen, but women… women are a scarcity.

This isn’t to say they are non-existent; they’re just difficult to come by. To be fair, they aren’t completely to blame — women and girls have to deal with the same dynamic with men and boys.

As men (not boys), we have to make sure we don’t get stuck dating a girl, it’ll probably be the worst decision of our lives. While it can be difficult to tell the two apart, there are 10 obvious giveaways:

1. Girls like to dress in revealing clothes because they think they look sexy – women know they look sexy no matter what they wear.
Women understand that being provocative isn’t the only way to be sexy. A woman doesn’t have to have her everything hanging out in order to feel sexually appealing. Women are so confident in their own skin that they do not care what they are wearing – they know that they are sexy because they are sexy.

2. Girls expect their men to know how they feel and what they’re thinking – women use their words.
Ladies… men cannot read minds. We wish that we could, it would make things a whole lot easier, but we can’t. Girls believe that their men should understand them so well that they simply know what they are thinking, how they are feeling and what they are “hinting” at.

Unfortunately, most men are not well-versed in picking up such signals. This is the point at which women get frustrated and bitchy while women accept their counterparts’ shortcomings and speak their minds instead.

3. Girls expect you to pay the tab – women are financially independent.
Girls like to be babied and taken care of, maybe they were spoiled growing up. Whatever the reason, girls don’t like whipping out their wallets. A woman, on the other hand, although confident enough to allow her man to pay for her sometimes, also makes a point to cover the bill herself from time to time – for both of them.

A woman likes to remind her man that she only keeps him around because he respects her and treats her well, and that she doesn’t need his cash.

4. Girls go out and get wasted – women can hold their liquor and know their limits.
You know that woman who’s hounding the table at the clubs, waiting to pounce on the next bottle? Of course, you don’t. A woman doesn’t do that. Only girls chug down free booze in order to get hammered – it allows them to make poor decisions.

This isn’t to say that women don’t drink their fair share. They do. But they know their limits and never drink to the point of losing control. Women always stay in control.

5. Girls can’t wait to update their Facebook status to “In a relationship” – women forget they have a Facebook.
Women are just too busy with real life to bother updating their Facebook statuses. They will probably do it eventually when they happen to be on there and remember to do so, but they won’t go running onto the site the second they believe an updated status won’t freak out their new man.

6. Girls watch junk TV – women read.
Some TV is great TV – the rest is pretty much garbage. Women do have their TV shows – some being guilty pleasures – but they also like to spend their time with their nose in books and magazines with substance.

They don’t enjoy filling their lives with meaningless pop-culture garbage that gets regurgitated over the decade. Women like to keep sharp. Girls like to keep occupied.

7. Girls talk about trivial matters – women know how to hold a stimulating conversation.
This is probably one of the biggest differentiating factors. Most girls are awful at holding conversations. They aren’t up-to-date on global affairs. They don’t have any intellectual hobbies or interests. And their opinions aren’t really their own, but are the opinions of others they heard and took as their own. Girls are boring. Women are fascinating.

8. Girls eat salads – women eat whatever the hell they want.
This isn’t to say that women don’t eat salads – some do. But they don’t eat salads in front of men just to go home afterwards and chow down on a pint of ice cream.

Women eat healthily because they respect their bodies. Girls eat healthily to let everyone else know that they are eating healthily. A real woman will sit down and have a burger and fries with you, with no fuss. She knows she can and because she wants to, she will.

9. Girls stick to what they know – women are always searching to widen their horizons.
Women are experienced in life and therefore understand the importance of experiencing life. They do their best to see the world, meet people, explore possibilities. They are passionate and driven. Women take life by the horns. Girls aren’t really sure what their purpose is – they’re hoping to find a man to pick them up and show them the way.

10. Girls need guardians – women don’t need anybody but themselves.
There is nothing, and I mean nothing, sexier than a female who can take care of herself. All females are capable of it, but few actually take care of business. Girls like to coast along in life – always looking for handouts.

Women take what they want and don’t need anyone to help get it. They are strong, confident and independent. Women are the future. Girls are the past.

An open letter to the girl who let the nice guy go.

I’ve seen it happen way too many times: The nice guy loses the girl for being exactly who he is.

What’s even worse is if he’s really the nice guy, he’s going to lose her and say nothing about it. He’ll accept it as something she truly wants and give her his best wishes, as she walks away being everything he could ever want.

On behalf of all the nice guys out there, this is to the girl who walked out on the best thing that ever happened to her:

Dear Girl Who Walked Away,

It’s not like you weren’t aware of what you were getting yourself into. He told you he was nice. He trusted easily and gave you all he could when he could.

The nice guy believes in doing things right. He was there when you needed him to be, and he went out of his way to make sure you knew just how much you could mean to someone.

We live in a generation where we all have to wear masks and play parts to make it through the battlefield of dating in the 21st century. There is no such thing as giving it your all.

We like quotes on Facebook and post things on Instagram stating we want the masochist one day and the romantic the next. We play these games where being available can only happen sometimes, and playing hard-to-get must be our number one priority. Why?

I thought the ultimate goal was to eventually settle down. I mean, what is the point of dating if you have no desire for it to go anywhere? If a one-night stand is what you’re looking for, leave the good guys alone and toy within the levels you lay down.

Save yourself time and energy because the good guy isn’t going to make it easy to just walk away. The good guy cares, so he’ll get his explanation from you even though he knows it’ll be a load of bull.

Every girl says she likes the assh*le because he’s the challenge — the one she must break, train and force to be more than just a douchebag. Have you ever thought, however, maybe you were the girl in need of learning what it means to actually feel again?

You went through something, like we all do, and because of it you changed. It’s normal and heartbreak happens, but the next assh*le didn’t fix what the first one did; he kept it the same or made it worse. His priority was not you and couldn’t be you. So now you’re bitter and closed off from anything remotely more satisfying than a one-night stand.

I won’t deny that the assh*le is fun or that a good time isn’t promised with him, but when it’s all said and done, is it ever more than just a good time? Probably not.

In fact, the assh*le has a charm about him; it’s the charm you justify your pursuit with. You say, “There’s just something about him.” However, it’s probably the same quality that ended up hurting you in the past.

So you tried to push the nice guy away. When he wouldn’t go away, you pushed harder. Still, he didn’t give up and every time you pushed harder, he pulled you in even more.

He ignored your fears and forced you to grow; he fought for your passions when you were too busy writing them off. He forgot your wants and focused on everything you needed. Then you walked away because he was too nice.

He gave you too much of everything you wanted, and life got too easy. You wanted conflict and hardship as if everything else in life did not promise you an endless journey of just that. This is where you failed.

The nice guy has been hurt, too, he just chose to stay nice. He learned that different people were going to provide him different things in life. The nice guy also chose not to let any of it change who he was.

So, he let you walk away and he called it a day. Everyone always says there are plenty of fish in the sea, and he let you go knowing this, even though it hurt.

What you don’t know is that someone else is out there, and she won’t be as foolish you. When you realize all you really want is the nice guy who cares about you too much, it’s going to be too late. Some other girl will be able to see how great he is, and she won’t waste a minute.

So you lost your Ted Mosby and, I promise, to him you were Robin. The nice guys are there to give you a break, a light to something more than the games we identify our generation with.

He may have loved you too soon and it was too crazy and too much, but guys like Mosby don’t happen every day; they happen never. He got you the blue French horn, and he made you feel love when love was no longer a part of your vocabulary. You were now saying “I love you” again and remembering what it felt like.

He was the guy you were supposed to end up with, who makes everything change. I just wish you’d see it before another girl does because at the end of the day, everyone, including the nice guy you don’t deserve, is rooting only for you.

Sincerely, The Girl Who Was Too Late.

I'll be there when your hair turn gray.

Las cosas solo ocurren una vez.

Que me sé sus cicatrices y el sitio que le tienes que tocar para conseguir que se ría. Que conozco su voz en formato susurro, en formato gemido y en formato secreto. Pero además la he visto seria, ser ella misma, y en serio que eso no se puede escribir en un poema. Que no sabes lo que sentía cuando se revolvía en la cama, y qué fácil parece a veces enamorarse. Ya sé de sobra que tiene esa sonrisa y esas maneras y todo el remolino que forma en cada paso de gesto que da. Todo eso de que ella puede llegar a ser ese puto único motivo de seguir vivo y a la mierda con la autodestrucción... Todo eso de que los besos de ciertas bocas saben mejor es un cuento que me sé desde el día que me dio dos besos y me dijo su nombre. No sabes lo que es despertarte y que ella se retuerza y bostece, luego te abrace, y luego no sepas cómo deshacerte de todo el mundo. Que no sólo conocía su última pesadilla, también las mil anteriores, y yo sí que no tenia cojones a decirle que no a nada, porque tengo más deudas con su espalda de las que nadie tendrá jamás con la luna (y mira que hay tontos enamorados en este mundo). La he visto formar un charco de arena rompiendo todos los relojes que le puso el camino, y la he visto hacer la competencia a cualquier amanecer por la ventana. No me hablen de paisajes si no han visto su cuerpo.

¿Qué voy a enseñarle a unos ojos que no ven?

Una sonrisa y un recuerdo me bastará por un tiempo pero la pregunta es, ¿hasta cuando?..

Quiero volverte a ver, que el destino nos vuelva a juntar.. pero ya nada volverá a ser como antes, es más, es que nunca será como antes, ni se acercara a lo que fuimos.. quizá solo te vea en fechas señaladas o quizá nunca mas, no sé que me duele más si tu sonrisa o tu indiferencia hacía mi... asumo que me enamore de un imposible, el cual me ve sin observarme, me roza sin tocarme, se expresa y no me habla... como olvidar tu sonrisa, tu mirada y como olvidar que rezaba para que no te marcharas. Y aunque tu no lo sepas.. nos dijimos tanto.. fue una relación tan adictiva como la heroína, pero tengo el alivio de que en mis sueños te puedo ver. Nunca pensé que me enamoraría de ti, nunca lo planee llegaste para innovar sensaciones que el abandono había escondido, me recordaste que existe el amor. También recuerdo mis días de lágrimas, los últimos días que estabas aquí, pero fue en vano, por que te fuiste y tras cuatro meses te vi, y sentía que el corazón se me salia por la boca, que tenía ganas de llorar, que no sabia que hacer.. pero tu sonrisa fue lo que colmo mi felicidad, no puede dejar caer unas lágrimas sin que me vieras en el autobús, quien lo iba a decir que esa tarde por Valencia en soledad me recompensaría con tu presencia, el verte me dio fuerzas para no seguir haciendo lo que hacía hasta un tiempo, y como dicen, las heridas duelen o dejan cicatriz, tú... me duele el no tenerte y una cicatriz el daño que me hiciste sin quererlo, y es que ya no quiero más sonrisas sin latido... me engañe durante meses para seguir viviendo, pero realmente vivo una mentira en la que solo yo sé la verdad, que a veces esa mentira es la única razón por la que sonrió, te hecho de menos sabes? Pero mi vida sigue, lejos de ti, no es lo que quise, aunque te quiera mas que nada en el mundo, por fin tengo a alguien que me quiere por lo que soy (yo), y aunque tú me hayas marcado para toda la vida, también espero vivir mi propia historia con alguien, no solo.. en fin.. que necesito volverte a ver, y que te tengo en mi cabeza todos los días y a todas horas, pero es lo que ahí...

She's never gonna look up to me. Ever.

Creo que es el momento de cerrar una página de mi vida, y no porque quiera hacerlo, si no porque ya no puedo seguir sintiéndome como me siento. Solo quiero escribir una ultima cosa y en el idioma que hace que no me sienta ridículo a la hora de leerlo (suena estúpido eh, haha)

This is the story of the first and last time I ever fell in love. And of the beautiful, complicated, fascinating woman who inhabits my soul. Whether we're together or apart, you will always be the woman of my life. If I had the choice of hanging out with anyone in the entire world or sitting at home with you eating pizza watching a crappy TV show, I'd choose you every time. The only man I will ever envy is the man who wins your heart, and I will always believe it was my destiny to be that man. I never really believed I would find somebody that I love as much as you. If we never see each other again, and you're out walking one day and you feel a certain presence beside you... that will be me... loving you... wherever I am.

Now I write 10 rules for the man who wins your heart:

1. Don't ask her to be feminine 2. Drink Coke instead of Juice 3. If she hits you, act like it hurts. If it hurts, act like it doesn't 4. On your 100th day together, give her a rose 5. Make sure you learn karate 6. Be prepared to go to prison sometimes 7. If she says she'll kill you, don't take it lightly 8. If her feet hurt, exchange shoes with her 9. She likes to write. Encourage her 10. Love her more than anything in the whole world.

See ya my little animal disaster. Your favourite apple.

Paseando me encontré a mi reflejo, no habían espejos ni cristales, pero ahí esta, es él.

Todo beso lanza un mensaje.

Y el ultimo decía adiós.

Sometimes it's hard to be happy when friends and family are going through hard times. But being sad with them helps no one.

Alive.

Wannabe (Ohhh)
Millionaire
Fuck!
I got something exploding inside of my head
I will try to forget everything that you said

Royalty (Ohhh)
Counterfeit
Whore!
I will try to forget everything that you said
I got something exploding inside of my head

Alive
Alive or dead
Alive

Company (Ohhh)
Wait for it...
Go!

I got all that I wanted in life
I got something you cannot buy
I got all that I wanted in life
I just need a break
I just need a break

I got something exploding inside of my head
I will try to forget everything that you said

Alive
Alive or dead
Alive

(Alive) Lest we forget
(Alive) It's now or never
(Alive) Will burn again
(Alive) Will burn forever

I'm drowning
It's over
We're growing
Unstable
Unable
To give in
Keep dreaming
Keep living

With your love I can feel more than anyone
In your heart I can see more than anyone
With your love I can feel more than anyone

I'm falling
Hungover
The world is
Unstable
Ungrateful
To fit in
I love you
But I'm sinking

Just like always...
Like always
Just like always...
Like always

With your love I can feel more than anyone
In your heart I can see more than anyone
With your love I can feel more than anyone

So hold on to it tight

Unfortunately, for me, being me was mine.

“Después de un tiempo, uno aprende la sutil diferencia
entre sostener una mano y encadenar un alma.
Y uno aprende que el amor no significa acostarse,
y que una compañía no significa seguridad,
y uno empieza a aprender…

Que los besos no son contratos y los regalos no son promesas,
y uno empieza a aceptar sus derrotas con la cabeza alta
y los ojos abiertos,
y uno aprende a construir todos sus caminos en el hoy,
porque el terreno de mañana es demasiado inseguro para planes…
y los futuros tienen su forma de caerse por la mitad.

Y uno aprende que si es demasiado
hasta el calor del sol puede quemar.
Así que uno planta su propio jardín y decora su propia alma,
en lugar de que alguien le traiga flores.

Y uno aprende que realmente puede aguantar,
que uno es realmente fuerte,
que uno realmente vale,
y uno aprende y aprende… y así cada día.

Con el tiempo aprendes que estar con alguien
porque te ofrece un buen futuro,
significa que tarde o temprano querrás volver a tu pasado.

Con el tiempo comprendes que sólo quien es capaz
de amarte con tus defectos y sin pretender cambiarte
puede brindarte toda la felicidad.

Con el tiempo aprendes que si estás con una persona
sólo por acompañar tu soledad,
irremediablemente acabarás no deseando volver a verla.

Con el tiempo aprendes que los verdaderos amigos son contados
y quien no lucha por ellos, tarde o temprano,
se verá rodeado sólo de falsas amistades.

Con el tiempo aprendes que las palabras dichas en momentos de ira
siguen hiriendo durante toda la vida.

Con el tiempo aprendes que disculpar cualquiera lo hace,
pero perdonar es atributo sólo de almas grandes.

Con el tiempo comprendes que si has herido a un amigo duramente es muy probable que la amistad nunca sea igual.

Con el tiempo te das cuenta que aún siendo feliz con tus amigos,
lloras por aquellos que dejaste ir.

Con el tiempo te das cuenta de que cada experiencia vivida,
con cada persona, es irrepetible.

Con el tiempo te das cuenta que el que humilla
o desprecia a un ser humano, tarde o temprano
sufrirá multiplicadas las mismas humillaciones o desprecios.

Con el tiempo aprendes a construir todos tus caminos en el hoy,
porque el sendero del mañana no existe.

Con el tiempo comprendes que apresurar las cosas y forzarlas a que pasen ocasiona que al final no sean como esperabas.

Con el tiempo te das cuenta de que en realidad lo mejor no era el futuro,
sino el momento que estabas viviendo justo en ese instante.

Con el tiempo verás que aunque seas feliz con los que están a tu lado,
añorarás a los que se marcharon.

Con el tiempo aprenderás a perdonar o pedir perdón,
decir que amas, decir que extrañas, decir que necesitas,
decir que quieres ser amigo, pues ante una tumba, ya no tiene sentido.

Pero desafortunadamente, sólo con el tiempo…”

Something better came along.

Hold those tears
Just tell me it's over so I can get over you
All my fears
You say that you're sorry but you will be sorry soon

I feel bad but I can tell by the height of your shoulders that you're glad
All along I guess you were just another line in another song

All of those things you said
Did you mean any of them?
I needed that lift that I got from your texts and calls
But something better came along
Now you're dead to me
A distant memory
Will you remember my name when you're grey and old
When something better came along

Those few nervous dates
I was drinking before I met you so I could talk
Nothing more than mates
I was drinking throughout until I could barely walk

I'm a fool
I should've guessed by your attitude that you're too cool
Did you care at all?
I've gotten used to being wrong.

And I’m feeling colder, like the wildest ocean...

Vuelvo a casa una vez más y no sé que siento, he pasado demasiado tiempo en acción, es todo estático. He estado trabajando en un destino y solo quiero irme.

No tengo dirección. Digo que no tengo dirección.

Miro el cielo pero las estrellas se están derrumbando y se que tu y yo compartimos el mismo cielo. Soy honesto conmigo mismo, los hombres de bien no mienten, he estado escapando de los mismos delitos. Me perdí en una constelación. Me muero por saber de tu corazón, todos tus temores y por qué son los tuyos. Soy un fantasma que aparece y desaparece.

Estoy intentando resolver las partituras, las melodías, las notas... Cada noche tiene una banda sonora diferente y te necesito ahora, te necesito.

No tengo dirección.

"No te enamores de una mujer que lee, de una mujer que siente demasiado, de una mujer que escribe...

No te enamores de una mujer culta, maga, delirante, loca. No te enamores de una mujer que piensa, que sabe lo que sabe y además sabe volar; una mujer segura de sí misma.

No te enamores de una mujer que se ríe o llora haciendo el amor, que sabe convertir en espíritu su carne; y mucho menos de una que ame la poesía (esas son las más peligrosas), o que se quede media hora contemplando una pintura y no sepa vivir sin la música.

No te enamores de una mujer a la que le interese la política y que sea rebelde y sienta un inmenso horror por las injusticias. Una que no le guste para nada ver televisión. Ni de una mujer que es bella sin importar las características de su cara y de su cuerpo.

No te enamores de una mujer intensa, lúdica, lúcida e irreverente. No quieras enamorarte de una mujer así. Porque cuando te enamoras de una mujer como esa, se quede ella contigo o no, te ame ella o no, de ella, de una mujer así, jamás se regresa..."

Maybe one day I'll fly next to you.

Thank you for all the small things.

Querer no está de moda.

Solemos caer en el error de obsesionarnos con el pasado y dar vueltas una y otra vez a lo que hicimos mal y, todavía más, a lo que nos hicieron peor. Y me resulta triste. Hay tantas formas de querer en presente y malgastamos el tiempo, invirtiéndolo en intentar cambiar eventos inamovibles y añorar situaciones que ya fueron escritas hace mucho. La mayoría de las personas tienes la grandísima suerte de conocer y compartir grandes momentos en este mismo instante con padres, hermanos, abuelos, tíos, primos, amigos y, cómo no, másqueamigos. Sin embargo, nos dedicamos a lamentarnos por cómo quisimos en un pasado y en pensar en qué habría sucedido si la suerte nos hubiese sonreído de otra manera, si la música hubiese sonado a otro ritmo, o si nos hubiesen dado una mano mejor con algún que otro as.

¿Por qué tanta obsesión con algo tan remoto como el pasado si ya está lejos?

Yo creo que la respuesta es sencilla: el presente da miedo. 

Es retador. Es difícil. Te da en las narices. De golpe. Es ese muro gigante contra el que te chocas. El que requiere escalarlo y sudar para conseguir llegar al otro lado. Ese.

Pero lo que más caracteriza al presente es que es el momento en el que menos información tenemos a la hora de actuar y eso complica la situación en el momento de decidir.

 ¿Cuántas veces decimos “si en el momento lo hubiese sabido habría hecho las cosas de otra manera”? El pasado es fácil porque controlas la situación. Sabes todo de él. Del ahora en realidad no sabes nada. Las decisiones las tomamos en base a corazonadas y después tiramos los dados, cruzamos los dedos y esperamos que todo salga bien.

Y por eso es más fácil decir que quisiste a alguien, no que lo quieres ahora. Lo que pasa es que para querer, en presente, hoy, ahora, en este mismo instante y no otro, hay que ser valiente. Hay que echar toda la carne al asador y lamentablemente eso no está demasiado difundido. Según nos vamos haciendo más mayores aprendemos, a modo de coraza, a idealizar las relaciones y momentos pasados, en vez de valorar lo que tenemos en la actualidad. Algunos directamente cambian lo que en verdad significó y lo que sucedió, mezclando una extendidísima imaginación, deseos frustrados y mentira poco original con mucha maestría y alguna que otra dosis de realidad, porque “sino sería inventárselo del todo”. Explotamos al pasado hasta que no le queda ni una sola gota de jugo, nos evadimos con él cuando lo consideramos oportuno y el pobre no tiene ni voz para quejarse.

Y es que cuando la realidad choca, recurrimos a este tipo de trucos, engañándonos tan solo a nosotros mismos. El problema es que la realidad es cruda pero, ante todo, es real. Y eso es lo importante que con demasiada frecuencia decidimos olvidar.

Es más fácil haber querido que querer en presente porque querer a alguien es mantener esa promesa cuando ya no te conviene. Es hacer que todas las palabras que algún día dijiste en estado de euforia máxima sigan teniendo el mismo sentido en los malos momentos. Es estar dispuesto a luchar hasta el final y poner las necesidades de otra persona muy por encima de las tuyas. Es decir adiós la egoísmo, al “yo y sólo yo”. Es no tirar la toalla en cuanto se avecina tormenta. No es sólo tragarte el orgullo, sino que es dejarlo tirado en la cuneta y abandonarlo para siempre. Sayonara, baby. Es convertir sus alegrías en las tuyas, e ir más allá, haciendo lo mismo con las penas, para bien o para mal. Es aprender a ceder y a olvidarte de la ley del talión. Es saber seguir tirando del equipo cuando haya una lesión. Es estar dispuesto a poner la otra mejilla, como mínimo.

Y sobre todo es dejar de decir “querer”, y transformarlo con el tiempo en “amar“. “Querer” para mí suena a infatuación, a posesión y deseo efímeros. “Amar” está en otro nivel, es entregarse. Querer se llegará a querer a un puñado o dos, pero amar, sólo se ama a una persona en la vida.

Y aunque perdamos el rumbo y nos repitamos lo contrario, no nos podemos olvidar del objetivo final al que todos aspiramos: amar en presente y futuro, y dejar de querer en pasado.

“El amor no tiene nada que ver con lo que tú esperas obtener, sino con lo que tú esperas dar, que es todo.”

Where does the good go.

Where do you go with your broken heart in tow
What do you do with the left over you
And how do you know, when to let go
Where does the good go, where does the good go
Look me in the eye and tell me you don't find me attractive
Look me in the heart and tell me you won't go
Look me in the eye and promise no love's like our love
Look me in the heart and unbreak broken, it won't happen
It's love that leaves and breaks the seal of always thinking you would be
Real, happy and healthy, strong and calm, where does the good go
Where does the good go
Where do you go when you're in love and the world knows
How do you live so happily while I am sad and broken down
What do you say it's up for grabs now that you're on your way down
Where does the good go, where does the good go...

Cada noche tiene su banda sonora.

Temet nosce.

Look Up.

One day you'll have to let it go.

"I'm not a smart man, but I know what love is."

Borrador.

Maps.

I move slow, just slow enough to make you uncomfortable.

You say "I hate you", you mean it and "I love you" sounds fake, it's taken me so long to figure that out. I used to love the taste I would do anything for it. Now I would do anything to get the taste out of my mouth. And you're so confident but I hear you crying in your sleeping bag.

But you were broken bad yourself, you were mad as hell you felt. If you had done anything with anyone else it would have worked out so well.

But you are an artist and your mind don’t work the way you want it to. One day you’ll be washing yourself with hand soap in a public bathroom and you’ll be thinking how did I get here, where the hell am I. If the rolls were reversed you could have seen me sneaking up, sneaking up from behind.

And we're still us.

I'm still me.

Don't give up on me.

I feel that when I'm old I'll look at you and know the world was beautiful...

Keep my heart somewhere drugs don't go.

You kill me, you always know the perfect thing to say.

23.

Which classic Jimmy Eat World song are you?

I got: “23”

"You’re a hopeless romantic, essentially good-hearted, and a maybe a little unlucky sometimes. You take your passing years with a sense of bittersweet urgency."

Oh boy...

Another sad song.

Flashback to 2013, it's the summer, not a cloud in the sky. Present day, things have changed, summer's over and it rains here every day. But how so? I'm only 23 years old. I used to be so happy, now here's another sad song by a sad boy playing the saddest chords he knows. Don't cry, we all make mistakes from time to time. Unfortunately, for me, being me was mine.

Would you tell her there's no other, introduce her to your mother. You say you love her, but you don't love her.

She's another scrubber.

Description of paradise.

This morning,
with her,
having coffee.

Estar viendo Spider-man y...

Historias.

¿Acaso sientes
Cadenas que oprimen el pecho
Gritos desgarrados en los oidos
Que declaran la guerra al amor
Y lo punzan sin pensar

En si quiero
Perder cuanto deseo
Por azar o por destino

O si muero
Y tú mueres conmigo

Dejando historias escritas
En folios de desgarros donde escribo
Sobre nosotros:
Ninfa y Luna
Y falso poeta
Que la venera

Que recoja polvo
Este cuaderno en sangre
Y que acabemos en eso
Solo historias? ¿Acaso quieres
Que lloremos divididos
Escribiendo en otras camas
Sobre quién era yo
(inmaduro que te quiere
Entre versos y errores)
Y tú
(musa de mis promesas
De azúcar y lima
Fraula o fresa)
Que nos amamos
Conjugados en pasado
Esta vez?

Caigo en dudas
Y en condena
De que el fuego me consuma
Y ya quema

Tan solo al pensar
De cuál es tu decisión
Si acaso sientes
Como yo

Si acaso quieres

O si no...

-Peter.

Pulled aside as if I was the wrong one, you said it all and you made me the lost one. Elevated by your greatest mistake, now I'm all alone. I bet you couldn't tell that I felt the same way, struggling just to get to the next day. I'm not force fed lies while I'm by your side. Shaking your head doesn't change this. Preparing myself for a train wreck, I can't be saved. So tell me why can't you see this is where you need to be? You know, it's taken it's toll on me, but I don't feel invisible. Tell me why can't you see this is where you need to be? You know, it's taken it's toll on me, so I'll hope for a miracle. Yeah, I'll hope for a miracle. Holidays tend to make me feel whole again. Rainy days make me feel like the dream is dead. I can show you what it's like to be down when you're all alone. I'm quite aligned to your design. What's mine is yours, and that's just fine. I'm finally acquiring the state of mind that everything is gonna be alright.

And if you want to be free, I can't be the one to make you believe. You've still got this promise to keep. Step back and wash away the reckless intentions. They're leaving me breathless. Find a way to stay in your skin. So tell me why can't you see this is where you need to be? You know, it's taken it's toll on me, but I don't feel invisible. Tell me why can't you see this is where you need to be? You know, it's taken it's toll on me, so I'll hope for a miracle. Yeah, I'll hope for a miracle.

Lie on the stage.

And before the sun came forgotten her old name.

Smile.

What didn't kill me it never made me stronger at all.

I wanna be drunk when I wake up
On the right side of the wrong bed
And never an excuse I made up
Tell you the truth I hate
What didn't kill me
It never made me stronger at all.
Love will scar your make-up, lip sticks to me
So now I maybe lean back there
I'm sat here wishing I was sober
I know I'll never hold you like I used to.

But a house gets cold when you cut the heating
Without you to hold I'll be freezing
Can't rely on my heart to beat in
'Cause you take parts of it every evening
Take words out of my mouth just from breathing
Replace with phrases like when you're leaving me.

Should I, should I?
Maybe I'll get drunk again
I'll be drunk again
I'll be drunk again
To feel a little love

 I wanna hold your heart in both hands
Not watch it fizzle at the bottom of a Coke can
And I got no plans for the weekend
So should we speak then
Keep it between friends
Though I know you'll never love me like you used to.

There may be other people like us
Who see the flicker of the clipper when they light up
Flames just create us but burns don't heal like before
And you don't hold me anymore.

On cold days cold plays out like the band's name
I know I can't heal things with a hand shake
You know I can't change as I began saying
You cut me wide open like landscape
Open bottles of beer but never champagne
To applaud you with the sound that my hands make.

Should I, should I?
Maybe I'll get drunk again
I'll be drunk again
I'll be drunk again
To feel a little love.

All by myself
I'm here again
All by myself
You know I'll never change
All by myself
All by myself
I'm just drunk again
I'll be drunk again
I'll be drunk again
To feel a little love.

La psicobiología del beso.

Un beso es bastante más que un beso. Un beso es ante todo un intercambio crudo de información que puede revelar en pocos segundos si somos o no genéticamente compatibles con nuestros pretendientes, si merece la pena esa relación o si hay que pasar de hoja y proseguir la búsqueda.

«Hay muchas fuerzas que pueden conectar románticamente a dos personas», admite el psicólogo Gordon Gallup. «Pero un beso, y particularmente el primer beso, puede romper fácilmente el vínculo».

Gordon Gallup, Susan Hughes y Marissa Harrison son los autores de un reciente estudio titulado 'La psicobiología del beso romántico', que ha saltado a la portada de 'Scientific American Mind' y ha servido para replantear todo lo que hasta ahora sabíamos sobre el contacto boca a boca. Según un sondeo realizado por los tres especialistas entre 1.041 estudiantes de la Universidad de Albany, el primer beso sirvió para que muchos perdieran el interés por su potencial pareja.

«Cuando dos personas se besan, se está produciendo un complejo intercambio de señales químicas», sostiene Gallup. «Ese contacto puede activar mecanismos inconscientes que actúan para evaluar nuestra compatibilidad genética o nuestra viabilidad reproductiva con la persona que estamos besando».

Así se explica, en su opinión, el rechazo repentino que mucha gente experimenta tras la primera descarga a la altura de los labios. Las neuronas sensoriales entran en acción y los mensajes bombardean el cerebro en unos instantes que serán decisivos. La experiencia es similar en los hombres y en las mujeres, aunque ambos valoren de distinta manera el hecho de besarse.

Only real when shared.

There's no greater sadness. I have never felt so alone.

I cannot find the words to express how much I need you. Your touch, your smile, your laughter. Your face. I don't need pictures 'cause I know that you live through me. I don't need these hollow pictures. You live through my skin, you live through my breath, you live through my hatred and dead smile. You are alive. I know that one day we will be together. One day we'll laugh together, one day we'll live forever.

Set me free.

Set me free. Deliver me where I'm supposed to be. Take me to this place where I don't have skin nor face. Take me to this place where no gods created hope and grace. I don't need this in my life. All I need is the beat of the drums to set me free. I want out! Take me to this place where I'm not running from myself. Take me to this place where I deserve a second chance. Please take me home and show me the place where I carry only my own weight. Set me free. Deliver me. Expectations - dead, life - no. I just want to be a better man and build my own way to happiness. Take my skin and take my face I don't need your hope and grace. No, I don't need you, all I need is the beat of the drums to set me free.

Cada vez son más mujeres y más jóvenes en cuanto a edad las que de forma particular deciden subir a páginas o redes fotos en las que se vean sus pechos tanto de forma insinuante o sugerente como de forma integra.

Como persona, me pregunto si conocen dónde se encuentra la fina línea que separa ese tipo de fotos de la sensualidad o belleza artística del sentimiento de aceptación por su cuerpo tanto de ellas mismas como de los demás.

A mi fotos del estilo sólo despiertan vergüenza ajena en mi como hombre.

Ahí está el núcleo social en el que mundialmente vivimos, haciendo que mujeres se sientan integradas, aceptadas y busquen “amor” (cariño) y reconocimiento en las redes sociales a través de mostrar su cuerpo a quien haga clic en su perfil.

Ahora que venga la típica a decirme que "lo hace porque le da la gana"; que me parece muy bien, no apunto a nadie; pero detrás de ese "me da la gana" o ese "me gusta hacerlo", hay una razón que únicamente ellas mismas conocen y que a mi ni me va ni me viene.

¡Exista paz y luego gloria!… pero no se vendan, valen mucho más que una figura bonita o insinuante a través de un puñado de pixeles.

I’m afraid I’m always going to feel this way. Empty and sad. Grasping at nothing. Left wondering. The feeling of stupidity. I remember when I told him I was in love with her.

I remember his look... when she saw me standing there. His eyes. Flickered for a few seconds... then... cold.

Pesadillas y más pesadillas, quiero que termine ya...

I'm so tired of the rain falling softly on the ground. Just enough to get my feet wet but not enough to let me drown. I've been laying in my bed wishing I had never woken. Begging to rid my head of every word you've ever spoken. Broke my knuckles on the wall because I thought about the call, where you said you'd always love me. Do you not tell the truth at all? Well if I ever cross your mind, make sure you write down the times so I will know the moments I was eating you alive.

Now I lay here waiting with the hope that I might find some sleep. I need some sleep tonight. 'Cause i've been waiting on your call but I know it well never come but im still waiting by the phone.
And dont you dare say you ever loved me or even tell me that you cared, 'cause you knew what you were doing and you know just what you've done. How dare you say, you miss me, with your spit still on his tongue. I am broken. I am beaten. I'm mistreated and im torn. I am cold with no direction but I'm lost without your warmth. I'm trying hard to find some hope that I might get the chance to breathe. Get off my mind. Give back my heart and get the fuck away from me.

I know I couldn't give you much but I know I gave my best. You were always my princess and now he's sliding up your dress. And I know I gave the world everything ive ever had. Johnny cash said love would burn. I never thought it'd hurt this bad.

You are the itch that's on my back. You are the gum under my shoe. You are the horrors of my past. You are the chill that haunts the room. You are the creaking on my steps. You are cancer. You are plague. You are regret. You are disease. I wish that you would go away.

When I promised you the world I was just trying to make it better.

The quiet things that no one ever knows.

Falling leaves.

Paint the lines on perfect eyes that circle the object of my sincere affection, my undivided attention. Lie where you won't see yourself in that way.

Don't remember this. No, don't remember this. We are losing it all, but we are gaining the world with our hands tied. Your arms placed upon mine and the sky looks so right, and you're mine tonight.

All we are is paralyzed from the face down. We're still alive with our fake smiles. When the camera's away...

Two coffins.

Keep your chin up out there, don't forget where you came from and who cares about you.

It's hard to think that some people in this world look at me with the same eyes as yours.

Don't get me wrong, I wish a lot of things were the way they used to be. The streets that used to make me feel alive just make me feel alone.

All you want is the attention from every eye and ear.

I'd rather sleep with just my boney knees and the thought of someone that stands up straight for me. I guess I'll sleep alone tonight hahaha

You'll tell everyone you're different but you're just a shade of grey that never stuck out to anybody. And all of your shitty friends that you say you'll keep it together but I know you're gonna make those walls fall down, they always do.

I'd rather sleep with just my boney knees and the thought of someone that stands up straight for me. I guess I'll sleep alone tonight hahaha...

I don't have a lot of money, that's fine by me. Maybe then I can feel my heart beat in rhythm with the real me.

Something's keeping me here.

There are minutes when I want to leave this town with the shirt on my back and Saves the Day stuck in my head but there's something keeping me here. I tell myself I won't go back, I'll never even look back. I don't know where I'm going, I'm having one hell of a time getting there... Everyone's trying to find the meaning of the nights.

And I thought this smile on my face would never lie...

If my name falls past your tongue and teeth, make sure it's in front of my eyes and not behind your cheap talk and eager lies. The things you do and the people you talk to don't impress me in any way. Take the easy way out and fall over the cheap talk you send away.

I'm gonna keep getting up even when you keep trying to pull me down. Remember these words when you've got nothing to prove.

It's been twenty something years and I've never been home, I don't even know who the hell I am anymore. I'm really just a kid who's stuck with all the fucked up stuff that comes with life, there's nights I think about how there's someone else that feels how I do.

The last thing I need is for words to sway past my ears through different voices than the person that first spit them out.

If you think this is about you, don't worry it's not. I wouldn't waste my breath on you.

I bleed from the inside, and I won't tell anyone.

I'm nowhere to find, but I couldn't care it all. Live like a ghost to keep me from talking, til' you notice where I'm at, 'cause I couldn't care at all.

So shut my eyes, take my life.

"You are the love of my life. Everything I have and everything I am is yours, forever."

Jump in. What are you waiting for?

20 things you (probably) didn't know about Garden State.

http://shortlist.com/entertainment/films/20-things-you-(probably)-didnt-know-about-garden-state

Unbelievable story.

How to hide your feelings.

Got a hole in my heart that stretches form coast to coast, constantly ripper apart from what I want the most and if I could find whoever designed you there'd be so much I wanna know.

Since I don't like my shape it takes time to prepare, a chronic illness comes in the form of despair. Do you wanna know something? You are the one thing that keeps me up (because I care).

Hello, please to meet you, I am fumbling with myself cause I am just too scared to greet you my love. Goodbye, nice to know you, I am leaving unexpectedly before I got to show you...

How month's go by and I only feel worse, try to forget the ones who forgot you first and you don't need him and she don't need you, gotta stop hanging around because the waiting hurts.

Gotta hole in my head that stretches from ear to ear, i dug it out because I couldn't take the fear and if I can't think, well, I guess I can't sink down and I won't waste another year.

Hello, I don't know you but you make me feel somehow there must be something that I owe you my love. Yes, it hurts me, please just take me to that special place where nobody deserts me.

The month's go by and I only feel worse, try to forget the ones who forgot you first and you don't need him and she don't need you. Gotta stop hanging around because the waiting hurts.

01/04/2014

Hoy ha sido un día más de rutina pero he tenido una sorpresa y es que Ruben Jinxo ha venido a Valencia y he podido verle un par de horas, hemos cenado juntos en el felisano y nos hemos puesto al día con la vida de cada uno. Ojala pudiese verles más a menudo a el y a Silvia...

Bueno ahora me voy a hacer mi ejercicio diario (diario Ha! lo pillas? estoy escribiendo un diario hahaha) y a descansar.

Sonando The epilogue - Crosses.

Hazy.

Some days I wake up dazed my dear, and I don't know where I am.
I've been running now so long I'm scared, I've forgotten how to stand.
And I stand alone in airport bars and gather thoughts to think:
That if all I had was one long road it could drive a man to drink.

But then I remember you, and the way you shine like truth in all you do.
And if you remembered me, you could save me from the way I tend to be.

Because I've said I love you so many times that the words kinda die in my mouth.
And I meant it each time with each beautiful woman but somehow it never works out.

But you stood apart in my calloused heart, and you taught me and here's what I learned: That love is about the changes you make and not just three small words.

Ya he terminado HIMYM...

Me quedo enamorado de Tracy, yo quiero una Tracy en mi vida.

Hoy he visto a una persona que es muy importante en mi vida.

Una pena no poder verla siempre que quiera...

Otro día más conseguido.

30/03/2014

Levántate hombre herido y grita.

Disfruta del poder y la belleza de tu juventud.

No hay nadie que vaya a estar ahí para siempre, por eso pensar que alguien te pertenece es una tontería, aun así a veces desearía que fueses muy pequeñita para meterte en mi bolsillo y llevarte siempre conmigo. Yo no quería ser posesivo, solo quería que me necesitaras. Te quiero mucho.

Come run away with me.

La mayoría de nosotros vive pensando que esto será eterno. Que somos inmortales y que las desgracias solo le pasan al de al lado. Vivimos inmersos en una ignorancia que nos hace débiles y solo lamentamos lo ocurrido cuando ya es demasiado tarde.

Y es que…

Tenemos la mala costumbre de dejar para luego, de reír poco y de querer hacerlo mañana. Tenemos la mala costumbre de echar de menos, en lugar de hacerlo de más. La mala costumbre de usar los luegos y no los ahoras. Luego te llamo, luego te escribo, luego te contesto, luego nos vemos. Y obviamente nunca llamó, nunca escribió, nunca contestó y nunca fue visto. Tenemos la mala costumbre de querer tarde. De valorar tarde. De pedir perdón demasiado pronto. Debería haber un número máximo de perdones. Perdonar nos hace grandes, de acuerdo, pero cuando tienes que perdonar todos los días, al final un lo siento se convierte en el comodín de cualquier pretexto injustificado, innecesario e inmerecido. Tenemos la mala costumbre de defender al malo y descuidar al bueno. De contar mentiras tra la rá y de tener que hacer un máster para descubrir verdades. Mantenemos en nuestra vida “amigos” porque sí y llenamos nuestras agendas de compromisos a los que realmente no queremos ir. Tenemos la mala costumbre de sentirnos mal por decir no y de creernos mejores por decir si.

Tenemos la mala costumbre de esperar a un cáncer, a una mala noticia o a una llamada de que alguien querido se nos fue, para tomar las riendas de nuestra vida y empezar a apreciar cada puesta de sol, cada mañana que te levantas de la cama y cada luna que abrazas en tu almohada. Tenemos la mala costumbre de usar el descuido a diario, olvidando que los pequeños detalles importan, que los pequeños detalles construyen grandes caminos y que cada lunes, puede ser el mejor día de la semana. Tenemos la mala costumbre de quejarnos por todo, de culpar siempre al otro porque claro, tú eres un ser perfecto y nunca, nunca, haces nada. Siempre es la parte contraria. Decimos muy pocos te quieros y hacerlo por primera vez es como “buf que va, no vaya a ser que se asuste”. ¿Asustarse de qué? ¿Cómo una persona puede asustarse porque alguien le quiera?.

Asústate si algún día te vas a la cama sin sentir que quieres a otra persona.

Asústate el día que te vayas a dormir sin decirle a esa persona lo importante que es para ti.

Asústate cuando no le des besos a tu madre y a tu padre.

Asústate cuando seas incapaz de abrazar a alguien y sentir esa sensación tan extraordinaria que producen los abrazos.

Asústate cuando las defensas de tu cuerpo se hayan vuelto inmunes al dolor ajeno.

Y cuando veas una injusticia y no hagas absolutamente nada para remediarlo.

Asústate cuando pases un solo día sin ayudar a alguien.

Asústate de verdad, porque créeme. Estás muerto.

Y es que…

Tenemos la mala costumbre de trabajar demasiado, de cargar con una mochila llena de cosas innecesarias y de comer más de lo que nuestro cuerpo necesita. Tenemos la mala costumbre de creernos mejores que los demás, de bailar poco, fumar mucho y respirar a medias. Tenemos la mala costumbre de ir caminando por las calles de nuestra ciudad mirando al suelo, o a nuestro teléfono móvil. ¿Alguna vez te has dado cuenta de lo bonitos que son los edificios de esas calles por las que pasas a diario? Por no hablar de la luz de las estrellas.

Tenemos la mala costumbre de empezar el gimnasio la semana que viene. De cuidarnos cuando ya es demasiado tarde y de tomar vitaminas cuando estamos enfermos. Tenemos la mala costumbre de creer que el pelo de aquel es mejor que el nuestro. Que su suerte es nuestra desdicha y de compararnos como si fuésemos presa de alguien que busca en comparadores de Internet. Tenemos la mala costumbre de medirnos por nuestros estudios o por nuestra altura. De confundir la belleza con la delgadez y de creernos que no somos capaces de conseguirlo, porque alguien una vez así, nos lo hizo creer. Y no fue nadie más que tú mismo.

Tenemos la mala costumbre de apuntarnos a clases de idiomas, cuando ni siquiera dominamos el nuestro. De querer conocer mundo y viajar lo más lejos posible cuando aún, nos quedan lugares maravillosos por descubrir en nuestra propia tierra. Tenemos la mala costumbre de comer animales, de contaminar el mundo y de lavar la ropa en vez de nuestras conciencias. Tenemos la mala costumbre de escuchar poco y hablar demasiado. De dar consejos y juicios de valor sin ser conscientes del poder que pueden llegar a tener nuestras palabras. Dejamos demasiado pronto y tenemos muy poca paciencia. Objetos de usar y tirar, sin importarnos lo más mínimo su destino. Tenemos la mala costumbre de creernos que lo sabemos todo. Cuando realmente, no tenemos idea de nada.

Wasapeamos mucho, dormimos demasiado.

Nos pasamos media vida o vida entera, soñando esa vida perfecta que nos gustaría tener. Cuando somos ajenos a que realmente la vida perfecta es ahora. Es cada momento, cada instante de los segundos que marca el reloj de tus días. Es cada oportunidad, cada sonrisa, cada beso y cada vez que te enamoras. ¡ENAMORÉMONOS TODOS LOS DÍAS DE NUESTRA VIDA! No pongas barreras a tu corazón y deja los prejuicios para aquellos que llevan el cartel de cobarde escrito en tinta permanente. Ni con disolvente se va.

Empieza a acostumbrarte a esta vida que a veces es dura. Terriblemente dura. Pero no te lamentes ni te vayas nunca a la cama habiendo hecho daño alguien. Habiendo dejado para luego esos ahoras que nunca llegaron. No habiendo cumplido ese sueño que tanto querías, no habiendo hecho unos kilómetros de más ese día porque tu cuerpo estaba cansado. No permitas que alguien fallezca para luego recordarlo y decirle mirando su foto, cuánto le querías. No dejes que la rutina o la sensación de eternidad descuide lo verdaderamente importante de tu vida.

En definitiva, no dejes que la mala costumbre sea la invitada de honor en los días que te quedan por vivir a partir de hoy.

Quiere ahora, no mañana.

A million times a day I try to fail or fail to try.

It's an easy way to live. It's a lifeless way to die.

Memoria selectiva para recordar lo bueno, prudencia lógica para no arruinar el presente, y optimismo desafiante para encarar el futuro.

El que busca la verdad corre el riesgo de encontrarla.

Where do we meet up in heaven?

24 Reasons your romantic relationship will never compare to J.D. and Turk’s.

http://www.buzzfeed.com/erinchack/reasons-your-romantic-relationship-will-never-compare-to-jd

It’s guy love. That’s all it is.

Have a guitar but have no money, that don’t mean that I’ve been blue.

I was never given the chance to make you proud. To show you I care. It's just too late to come back home.

Fui suficiente para hacerte sentir bien,
fui suficiente para hacerte sentir menos sola,
fui suficiente para ayudarte a dormir por la noche,
fui suficiente para parar tu corazón,
fui suficiente para parar,
un corazón.

-Peter.

Voy a pintar en esta ciudad una gran cantidad de colores nuevos y cuando tu mano se deslice por la mía yo sabré que estoy en casa. Eres oh tan digna de una noche más, tu eres el tipo de sueño que hace girar cabezas. Me dijiste todos tus secretos y sin decir una palabra supe que querías el cielo, solo tengo lluvia... pero todavía estoy sonriendo.

-Peter.

Never coming home.

3 words 8 letters.

You hang me up as a souvenir of what I couldn’t be.

And when your friends say I’m a waste of time, then you can find out on your own.

How does it feel?

How does it feel to be all that you are, all that you want to be. Is that what you want to be?

And how does it feel to be what you've become, what you said you would never be, 'cause I don't feel anything anymore.

So, take me away.

How does it feel to fit into a mold to let go of what you know and not have to hold your own.

And how does it feel to be just like your friends, to catch up on what you missed. As simple as you can get.

So, take me away...

...

You need not to climb mountaintops,
You need not to cross the sea,
You need not to find a cure for everything that makes you weak.
You need not to reach for the stars when life becomes so dark,
And when the wind does blow against the grain,
You must follow your heart,
You must follow your heart.

When all your friends have come and gone,
And the sun no longer shines,
And the happiness for which you long is washed away like an ocean's tide,
When all the hard times outweigh the good,
And all your words are misunderstood,
When the day seems lost from the start
You must follow your heart,
You must follow your heart.

If you feel you've paid the price,
And your wounds should cease to heal
And everything you love in life spins like a winding wheel.
If you should wake to find you're abandoned,
And the road you've traveled leads to a dead-end
When death creeps in to play it's part,
You must follow your heart,
You must follow your heart.

Estas son mis últimas confesiones, selladas con nostalgia y pesar. Fuimos los románticos incurables que verdaderamente creían en los finales felices. ¿Puedes oírme? Debería haber hecho más, yo debería haber aprendido tus canciones favoritas, que cantabas para dormir y despertarte con la promesa de que cada día sería mejor que el anterior. Recuérdame como alguien que estaba allí para ti, acuérdate de mí por todo lo bueno que había entre nosotros, y cada día sera mejor que el anterior.

Peter.

La muerte esta en mis labios. He enfureció a los dioses,
Ahora me muevo sin protección, todos nuestros ángeles fueron los accidentes,
Todavía me encuentro en la ambición y el deseo de cosas imposibles,
Mi lado sentimental será mi muerte.

Conduzco otro clavo hasta que construya una casa.
Recuerdo nuestro pacto, ambos dejamos de respirar, o yo deje de respirar.
Conduzco otro clavo hasta sentirme como en casa.
Voy a soñar esta noche.

Peter.

Recuerda cuando te ocurriría morir sólo para lograr la santidad, renacías en la belleza, brillabas como una luz sobre todo, así que aquí estas, tuu tímida sonrisa y tus ojos que podrían detener una habitación. A veces sólo necesitas a alguien para esconderte detrás.

Todos somos cobardes envueltos por el silencio mientras rogamos respuestas. Cuando haya terminado de coser las costuras a través de todas las noches ennegrecidas perdidas dentro de mí mismo, yo seré tu campeón respirando tu nombre, y cuando llegue el otro lado, voy a decirles a todos que se mantengan estables, algún día se les viene.

Las pastillas que caían como cascadas, las luces que me tragaban. No puedo seguir adelante. No voy a seguir adelante. Tu fuiste creada para cosas mejores. Encontré tus palabras en mi boca.

Peter.

Estoy harto de corazones rotos y me odio a mi mismo, a los enfermos de la duda y a los que fingen que no les importa. Ahora estoy anhelando los días en que el sonido de la risa nos hacía inclinar nuestras cabezas, los días en que lo tenía todo. Los años se extendían ante nosotros y sólo podían mejorar, la noche ha enviado su dolor y estoy preocupado porque ha usado hasta lo bueno en mí.

No quiero desperdiciar mi vida permaneciendo enojado y asustado. Aquí está la gran desconexión de nuestros corazones, y lo único que queda es caminar sobre, pero antes de irme, antes de irme, quiero que sepas que lucho y me temo que cuando llegue el momento no voy a saber cómo decir lo siento y te echo de menos.

Peter.

Redefiniendo la soledad.

Me siento en el borde, borracho en las promesas de verano. Me siento utilizado por los amantes y amigos, amantes y amigos. No tengo tatuado ningún corazón, perdido en el canto, la danza en los dormitorios y recuperar mi vida. Esta es la línea en la arena, esto es lo que es importante para mi.

Así que hasta la decadencia, la angustia, hasta el aislamiento, la soledad, hasta la desconfianza, y lo haré hasta la pérdida.

Yo vivo como si estuviera fuera de la ley, fracaso seguro sabiendo que nunca seré tan bueno otra vez, y no voy a amar como es la venganza. Aferrarse a tales esperanzas delgadas que fueron usadas ​​de manera egoísta, estoy dispuesto a apostar fuerte por lo que considero mis deudas pagadas.

Peter.

No estoy preparado para esto.

In love with the sound.

I've lead with the wrong foot again
Crossing lines no one asked you to defend.
You stare me down chanting conform or leave.
Conform or leave.

We've got our Old Pride and We've got our Honest Sleep,
We've got nights when the room came alive and reaffirmed our faith
That this can change lives.

We are the pulse that beats
And we are the breath that flows
And we will scream along until our heart stops.

And I no longer believe
That we are all in this together
So you can keep your basements
If it means we have to be better than our friends.
When did we start settling
When did we say good enough
If only we listened to all the words we sang,
Then I wouldn't have to remind you
Filled with fucking cliches
That I would rather
Play from the heart.

Only by the night.

Explosions in the sky.

To the flames.

I am the author of my life.
And I'm writing in pen, and I can't rub out my mistakes.
If I could start again in life, I would repeat all my mistakes.
They make us who we are in this world.

Making changes everyday, but it seems so empty,
I try so hard, but I am only a man.
How much longer can my brow damn these beads of sweat
before they sting my eyes?
Like time has shown me, so many times before.
How much longer can my will last me throughout this lifetime?
I struggle to find who I am anymore.

I know now that who I am is better than who I used to be.
If this is all I am, then so be it, this is all I can be.
I know now that who I am is better than who I used to be.
If this is all I am, then so be it, this is all I can be.
All I can be.

There are many things that aren't what they seem in this world,
Friendship is the best example of these.
I find myself questioning more and more every single day.
How much longer can we hold our brothers to these flames?
And the people who have meant so much to us?

Cage with gold bars.

Knowing this life is up to you
is something you have to hold onto.

There's no textbook for this life.
No saying what's right for me.
I'm not settling.
I'm still listening.
Just not buying in.

Your wealth and possessions don't impress me.
Or your life.
You can call it what you will but your paradise
is still a cage with gold bars.

I want to know what it feels like
to hold it in my hands and heart.
And let the warmth bask over me.
The feeling of being alive; hold it.
You never know when its leaving.
Let the course that's supposed to be, happen.

I follow you into the light.

I will.

One second, it's the same trick
I recognize that pretty charmful grin
Blk Stallion is the lifestyle
No exception, give in to all of it

I like how you move to the music
It's easy to like
'Cause baby you're born to be famous
With your name in the lights

I never thought that this could happen to me
Ha ha ha
Yeah, you never thought that this would happen
Did you?
Ha ha ha

Nineteen eighty seven.

In the waves a shoebox of ashes
A silver casket
A mother dressed for eternity's breath.

The Stretching.

I got sick, I passed out, I made a bet, she got fucked, I got paid, I'm out of debt, I've got my way of knowing things, you've got your legs around his waist, I never felt so betrayed, I never thought I'd be so trusting and I can see that this is all my fault, every day you'll feel this restless ache, you'll never get away from anything, he got shot, he got picked, he's cold and dead, I got caught, I woke fast, I'm out of bed, you should have waited longer cus now I'm not scared to ruin you, I know that I'm the one to blame, I never thought you'd be so easy, and I can see that this is all my fault, every day you'll feel this restless ache, you'll never get away from anything, I hope the wheels on her car burst and leave her buried in the dirt, I know it's wrong but I can't rest knowing she's alive and keeping busy.

Then realize that, oh God, you were not aware that I was in love with you.

Locket.

I got to tell you something, I wanna view your dreams
I wanna pull out your crazy and pour it over me.
I might take you somewhere far across the seas,
I need your faith, I need your everything.

As you enter into my curse our dreams reverse and the demons burst...

So I wait, anticipate to meet you tonight,
Come this way and I will bring your dreams to life.

I wanna move you somewhere close to ecstasy
I might tell you things some which you won't believe
I wanna view the signals that control your brain
I need a taste, I need your everything.

As you enter into my curse our dreams reverse and the demons burst...
So I wait, anticipate to meet you tonight
Just come this way and I will bring your dreams to life.

Trophy.

I've been waiting
For you to say the words
As we sail across the universe

Entertaining
You bring me to a stare
As you wave your heart into the air

I walk away
And play it safe
It's strange
How it works

Take your vices
And throw them in the drain
While you're laughin in the pouring rain

Are you sorry?
Well can you find the words?
You just say the lines that you've rehearsed

I'll walk away
And play it safe like you
I just walk away and play it cool
It's strange
How it works...

Thholyghst.

Baby, I don't mind if you play with me,
I don't mind, run away with me.

We'll drink from the waves and feel our souls,
Fall asleep on the graves and seal our souls.
Get drunk on the waves, reveal our souls,
Fall asleep on the graves and seal our souls.

Sin voz.

Lo que aprendí, pierde el valor,
cuando lo malo es lo mejor,
cuando me dan abrazos
los que quedan sin voz, sin voz

Dame un cielo y te pinto un sol,
con escombros de corazón,
te hablaré despacio
si despiertas en mis brazos

Se vuelve gris, la habitación
si guardo el alma en un cajón,
y yo pidiendo calma a
los que se quedaron sin voz, sin voz

Probé a dormir sobre un cartón,
donde un pedazo es un montón,
donde hablan con los gatos
los que quedaron sin voz, sin voz

Dame un cielo y te pinto un sol, con escombros de corazón, te hablaré despacio si despiertas en mis brazos.

Anything beautiful is worth getting hurt for.

"It's a lie. A kiss with open eyes."

Sorrowing man.

Hoy he comprendido una cosa. Eres una cobarde.

When time is poetry and stolen the world outside, the waiting crush my heart.

)

So take me back, back to better days when we were not afraid.

)

Daisy.

Nadie aprecia más las cosas que el que no las tiene.

10 cosas acerca de los sueños.

1) Olvidamos el 90% de los sueños.
2) Las personas ciegas también sueñan.
3) Todo el mundo sueña.
4) En nuestros sueños sólo vemos rostros de personas que ya hemos visto antes.
5) Hay quien sueña en blanco y negro.
6) Dominan las emociones negativas.
7) Los animales también sueñan.
8) Parálisis corporal.
9) Incorporación.
10) Los hombres y las mujeres sueñan de forma diferente.

23.

Hace ya bastantes días fue mi cumpleaños y estoy preocupado, estoy preocupado porque definitivamente he cambiado.

Estoy preocupado porque ya no soy el mismo que era hace un año, mis perspectivas de vida son radicalmente distintas a las que tenía, mis metas y objetivos están enfocados en algo muy superior a lo que me había dispuesto hace tiempo, ahora juego en grande pero en serio, mi prioridad es disfrutar mi vida.

Me preocupa que ya no soy el mismo hombre con el que se casó Mary, he cambiado mucho, lo tengo claro, busco disfrutar más los momentos, he cambiado muchas formas de hacer y sentir las cosas, tal vez ahora soy más sensible y realista de lo que era entonces, estoy más feliz que nunca, pero ya no soy el mismo, ¿afectará un cambio tan radical?

Me preocupa que me acabo de dar cuenta que he perdido muchos años de mi vida lejos de mi familia, tantas horas echado en la cama jugando a la Playstation fueron un desperdicio, ahora realmente los valoro y aprovecho al máximo el tiempo que tengo a su lado, pareciera que ahora ya nos estamos conociendo más.

Me preocupa haber descubierto que no es cierto que tengo mil amigos; en los últimos meses he dejado ir a muchas más personas que en toda mi vida, tal vez porque mis intereses han cambiado a tal grado que sólo han permanecido cerca aquellos que se sienten afines a mi nueva forma de ver la vida y que salir a tomar una cerveza mientras se mantiene una buena conversación me parece muy entretenido.

Me preocupa que ahora tenga amigos a quienes no les he visto la cara, pero que con sus comentarios, sus correos, sus llamadas por Skype o al móvil hemos creado vínculos mucho más fuertes que los que llegué a tener con la gente presencial.

Me preocupa que ya no necesite tantas cosas para vivir, he aprendido a disfrutar con lo que tengo y aunque si me doy mis gustos, ya no es una prioridad comprar religiosamente una película cada quince días porque con eso me sentía “completo“.

Me preocupa no estar viviendo siempre a las carreras, entregando todo tarde y mal hecho, en serio siento que a veces me ven como si fuera un matadito, pero para nada, sólo estoy muy bien organizado y enfocado en lo que tengo que hacer y cuándo.

Todo esto me preocupa y les voy a decir porqué, porque he descubierto que me gusta ser productivo y ser minimalista, me gusta tener un rumbo en mi vida, me gusta poder disfrutarla al máximo, me gusta viajar, convivir con la gente que amo, me gusta ser raro, pero también me doy cuenta que no es lo socialmente “correcto” porque no es lo que hacen los demás.

Pero ¿Saben algo? Mi regalo de cumpleaños será aceptar lo que ahora soy, vivir y apreciar cada oportunidad que la vida me presente, verme en cincuenta años y decir tuve una vida plena y feliz. Eso es lo que hoy acepto, soy diferente, soy raro, pero soy muy feliz.

Mi análisis realista del día de hoy es: Creo que conforme más voy aprendiendo y creciendo mejor me voy sintiendo, la realidad es que soy muy feliz y cada día lo soy más, sé que vienen muchas cosas por delante y cada vez estoy más listo para afrontarlas.

 Peter.

Estoy muy contento de no haber cambiado mi blog en 5 años =)

Que se dice rápido.

Por el placer de haber coincidido contigo en esta vida.

He aquí mi secreto, que no puede ser más simple: sólo con el corazón se puede ver bien; lo esencial es invisible a los ojos.

El Principito.

All the way you take me, all the way. And all I want is more.

Stood a chance.

Night.

Falling Leaves.

Hope.

Paralyzed.

Paint the lines on perfect eyes that circle the object of my sincere affection, my undivided attention.

Don’t remember this. No, don’t remember this. We are losing it all, but we are gaining the world with our hands tied. Your arms placed upon mine. And the sky looks so right, and you’re mine tonight.

Lie where you won’t see yourself in that way. And we’ll ride...

Departures.

I'm dying here before your eyes inside of darkened circles, I'm afraid of savage things I fought to keep away before I found out just what I found that I knew you'd become. Now you know the things I'm running from...

You could help me hide in the places I once lived and lost the one. Now you know the things I'm running from... Now you know the things I'm running from...

You're killing me baby, but I know your intentions are good. I read what you wrote out, asked me to slow down, I should I think you're trying to make it seem like it never could've meant enough, but what I'm hearing you say is that you're running away 'cause it meant too much.

So this isn't easy, I know the weather in La Pobla is best. Quart de Poblet got cold as I read your note walking. You said I guess I'll be home soon but things will be different I'm sure. So I thought that you should know if things are gonna change when you come home, maybe this time don't.

Arrivals.

You're killing me baby, but I know you're not trying to. It's just that I've crossed out more than I wrote down for you and now I'm trying to play it off, like, "Oh, I wasn't trying that hard".

What I'm trying to say is I was trying to say that you should come home. I know it seems crazy, but the weather changed as soon as I left and even wearing a coat now I think it's too cold to sit.

But I guess you'll be here soon, so you can see for yourself. I just thought that you should know If this is what happens when you go, maybe next time don't...

Hide your secrets.

The saddest tone was a voice I heard from a silent film you wrote, loud and clear was a muted song only two people could hear. So I'll go, living through these days acting like I've seen a ghost, a ghost.

This place is mocking my passive demise, these walls were safely hiding your lies. Their secret languages everyone speaks, so free except for me.

Can I save you? Will it make me feel like I'm in heaven? And stay true to me. Will it make you feel the same way I do and still feel sorrow.

But hate you just the same, hate you just the same.

Twelve ruthless days of just playing along, I guess you don't feel guilty at all. You've lost your touch with what's right and you're wrong with me but I can't see.

You must hate me.

I will confess that in time I gave up, fate's worse than death when it makes you forgive and just pretend.

I just want to feel safe, again.

Hace ya varios días murió el padre de una de las mejores personas que conozco, un chico que se merece todo y que nunca ha faltado cuando necesitas a alguien, su madre murió cuando el era más joven y ahora se ha quedado el solo con su hermano menor. Cuento todo esto porque es muy injusto, que a las mejores personas les pasen estas cosas... no se puede hacer nada, pero da mucha rabia. Dentro de unos pocos días sera el velatorio y el funeral...

Cuando ves estas cosas y como lo están pasando las personas te das cuenta de lo tonto que eres por sentirte tan mal por otras personas que ni si quiera te aprecian y que no quieren compartir tiempo contigo, no quiero sentirme así nunca más, no voy a sentirme así nunca más. Yo ya demuestro a las personas que aprecio que siempre voy a estar cuando me necesiten y cuando no.

No voy a vivir mirando hacia atrás, la vida es muy valiosa y merece la pena por muchas cosas, todos aquellos que ya no me han querido en sus vidas, espero que no me echen de menos porque no voy a volver. A cada uno nos ha tocado vivir una pero odio a la gente egoísta y que solo quieren ser una cara y cuerpo bonito que van pasando de persona en persona, que les traten como a gente importante aun que no lo sean y ellos tratar a la gente como le da la gana. Todas las personas valen, ya son ellos los que deciden si merece la pena ser unos hijos de puta o no.

Yo quiero morirme y que los que me han querido en mi vida no puedan olvidarse nunca de mi.

I don't need you to tell me that I'm alright.

Welcome to my cemetery gates,
I lost your love and I buried it here
'cause you're the one who stole my heart.



I don't need you to tell me that I'm alright, there's something in the air, there's something in the water dragging me down.



I just hope your mind stays stable when you're Cain and unable to speak to me again.



We never made it to the start of the race I guess I thought that in the end we would be saved, there's someone up in the sky looking down over me.



Well, call me selfish, call me what you will, I don't care about you anymore. You fucked me up and broke my heart in smithereens.

Just trying to remember where we came from.

We can do some damage, for the hours handy. All we'll do is, baby, shake it up, and maybe something may, something may catch fire.

Feliz día internacional de la mujer.

It's okay.

"Just go" you said. "Not forever, just for now". But what's the difference? What's the difference? What's the point? Let's be honest. You already had your mind made up before I even had the chance to plead my sorry case. But it's okay. Fast forward a couple months. I hate myself. I hate my friends. So fucking what? (So fucking what?) It's sad that it has come to this, but it was obvious. I could feel it in the way you held my hand like you were holding on to something you no longer want to have. I know, I know it's nobody's fault, but my own. "I never thought I'd say this, but I'm just glad to see you go". Could you imagine the sinking that my chest felt after hearing something like that? Of course you can. I bet you have. I bet it's keeping you up nights. I bet it doesn't. Who am I kidding? Who am I trying to convince? I know, I know it's nobody's fault, but my own. "And I never thought I'd say this, but I'm just glad to see you go". I know, I know it's nobody's fault, but my own, my own. I know, I know it's nobody's fault, but my own. And it haunts me. Every single word you said but I never thought I'd say this. But I never thought I'd say this. But I never thought I'd say this. But I never thought I'd say this. But I never thought I'd say this. It's okay. It's okay. Not forever. Not forever. Just for now.

Any minute now...

And it began with a subtle sense of apology to myself for what I am, and especially what I am not. Justifying my mistakes as if I'm owed anything for putting myself in a position to hate every miscalculated move I make. Stitch by stitch, I pull myself apart. Then you take a deep breath and say "Any minute now, things are going to change". Yeah, I am still running away. Wall to wall, empty like I am. How unfortunate. It's in my bones to turn my back and not feel a thing. There used to be seasons inside of my body that would radiate like Spring. My words came to me with capacity to forgive the cold in everything. Then you take a deep breath and say "Any minute now, things are going to change". Any minute now...

Just friends.

You walked in, expressionless. Cold like the space between your coat and your clothes. I'm in between deja vu and delirium, remembering things that haven't happened yet. And I don't think before I speak. What an empty attempt at a personality. We're just friends 'cause that seems to be what makes sense. Too bad it's all we'll ever have. And oh, the weight of the decisions that we make. The immediate gravity of everything. We're just friends 'cause that seems to be what makes sense. Too bad it's all we'll ever have (over, and over, and over and over again). The day you left, you came to collect all of your personal effects and I said: "Too bad it's all we'll ever have..." (Too bad it's all we'll ever have) It was at that time that I realized that you truly knew me better than I ever knew myself. (And as you walked away you said:) "I had this crazy thought that if I loved you enough you'd see that you deserve it... and not fuck it up like you always do, you always do, you always do, you always do, you always do, you always do, you always do, you always do. We're just friends 'cause that seems to be what makes sense. (You always do) Too bad it's all we'll ever have (too bad, that's too bad).

Not so young.

"Is this all I am? Is this everything that I am meant to be?" It's bringing me back to when I was young but not so young,  that I couldn't sort my feelings out. The kind of young where I thought I was friends with everyone. But I'm not honest. You're not either. What's the worst that could happen? Is this all I am? Is this everything that I am meant to be? Is this all I am? Is this everything that I am meant to be? It was a welcome distraction from a wall that I had yet to climb. So just think of all the good you could have done and all the time you could have saved by not wasting it on me. I don't mean anything I say. Is this all I am? Is this everything that I am meant to be? Is this all I am? Is this everything that I am meant to be? Because all we want to know is whether or not we're alone. (I don't mean anything I say. I don't mean anything I say) Because all we want to know is whether or not we're alone. (I don't mean anything I say) Is this all I am? Is this everything that I am meant to be? Is this everything that I am meant to be?

It's a long, long way.

Por fin me he liberado de las redes sociales, quiero ser un hombre de verdad, una persona de carne y hueso y no quiero formar parte de todas esas redes que no hacen nada más que mantenerte enganchado a agradar a gente que ni si quiera le importas y ni necesito likes de nadie, ni necesito publicar todo lo que hago, ni fotos, ni nada... no necesito redes sociales. No quiero más falsas apariencias ni engaños, que es lo único que son, bueno, las personas que las utilizan...

Me siento un poco más libre. Ahora la gente solo podrá conocerme por como soy en la realidad, y la verdad, no necesito nada más.

Voy a mantener este blog porque me gusta tener mi espacio donde expresarme y escribir lo que quiera.

He has the most brilliant way of reaching into my soul and saying exactly how I feel.

La banda sonora de mi vida actual.